A century of poverty

Chapter 41 Living

The mother was relieved, but the grandmother was not. She always felt that her eldest sister had been mistreated at her maternal grandparents' house, and she took her anger out on her mother.

Because my family has many members but few able-bodied workers, my father often takes sick leave, and when my eldest sister comes back, she has to go to the production team to participate in labor. My mother told her, "Now our family has to listen to the 'clanging' of the whole team while we're working."

The older woman said, "Our house is on North Street, so why are we in the first team on South Street? It's so far away, how inconvenient!"

Mom: "When you were in the North Street of the Senior Society, Xiao Pai, Xiao Lin, and Xiao Xiao Er always bullied you, so you were trying to avoid them."

Grandma stormed over to Mom, furious: "How dare you say she was bullied! We've been bullied at home, but no one's ever beaten to death! Is there anyone more inhuman than that Jiang Guangliang? We're just kids, what did we do wrong! Huh—you beat us to death..."

Grandma's words were like knives piercing Mom's heart.

Mom said, "Mom, stop yelling. He can't hear you anymore. I hate him too. If we lived closer, I would have gone to find him long ago. My daughter is my child; doesn't it hurt him to hit her?"

Grandma: "Zhang Xiwang, are you dead? How dare she argue with me like that!"

Father went up and started hitting her relentlessly. Not satisfied with just punches and kicks, he pulled out the door latch and swung it at Mother. Mother lay motionless on the ground.

At this moment, the eldest sister had gone to work, the second sister and the eldest brother had gone to school, and the younger children were left at home, crying and terrified around their mother.

She didn't know how much time had passed when Mom woke up, her head feeling so heavy! She opened her eyes to see several children crying in fear. She could move her arms and legs, and sat up; they felt cold. Her poor senses told her that her crotch was full of poop. She struggled to her feet, found her pants, and went to the outhouse to change.

Sensibility and reason returned, and tears of grief flowed like a spring. She started walking towards the East River, her older sister following behind, terrified. There was a river and a well to the east; she clung to her mother, weeping along with her. Her mother said, "Don't be afraid, you don't need to follow me. I won't die, I just came to the river to clear my head. I won't kill myself and leave you all behind..."

I lost my mother when I was little. If anyone calls me a "troublesome girl," I won't let you suffer like that.

About a month later, on a gloomy evening, the team came home from get off work. Mom was making dinner when she saw it was drizzling outside. She called out, "Big girl, take a rake to the street and gather the firewood that's drying in the sun together. It's raining."

Grandma chimed in, "If you want to order me around, just say so. What do you want her to do? Isn't she tired after working in the fields all day?"

Mother: "You've wronged me. How could I possibly order you around? I was calling her."

Grandma: "I'm wronging you? What wouldn't your family do!"

My mother was speechless. This was her pain too. Even if it was all my second brother's fault, what did it have to do with me? Why wouldn't she let me go? We've lived together for over twenty years. I've treated you with respect, humility, and sincere filial piety. Why can't you feel it? You keep rubbing salt into my wounds. Tears of grievance and pain streamed down my face as I cried, "How am I supposed to live? I gave birth to her and raised her, and she won't even let me ask her to chop some firewood." Waaah—

Father got up: "You wretched, spendthrift old woman, did someone in your family die? And now you're wailing again..." He slapped Mother across the mouth until blood flowed, then pushed her to the ground and beat her again, venting his anger on her. The younger siblings trembled with fear, panicked, and didn't know what to do.

What's even more unbearable is that her mother, despite being bullied like this, wasn't allowed to lick her wounds or catch her breath, and couldn't stop working. A family of about ten people, young and old, were waiting for her to cook for them. Her physical and mental health suffered immensely, and the pain she endured far exceeded her capacity to bear it. She wasn't some weak-willed, spineless fool; she had a clear sense of right and wrong and a strong sense of self-respect. Living such a wretched life was worse than death.

Whenever I think of death, a clear image always flashes before my eyes. A little girl who has lost her mother walks up to someone and says, "You naughty girl." A chill runs down my spine. I must live on, no matter what, I can't let anyone say those words about my child. What sustains me at that moment is the greatness of motherhood.

Grandma still felt she wasn't treating her eldest granddaughter well enough, so she packed her bags and went back to her parents' home at Diaoyutai. She told her brothers, sisters-in-law, and brother's wife, "Find a husband for our eldest daughter. Her mother can't stand her anymore; she can't stay in this house."

Within a few days, her family found a husband for her eldest granddaughter. The man's surname was Li, and he lived with his parents, two brothers, and an older sister who was already married. He was the eldest son, though he wasn't very good-looking. His father was a cook, and the boy worked as a cook with his father, doing odd jobs here and there. The family was relatively well-off.

Grandma listened and made the decision, "Okay," and sent her nephew from her maternal family to her home to take her eldest granddaughter to a blind date.

The older sister didn't like this young man. He was several years older than her, and he was too ugly. He was short, with small, dark eyes and pockmarks.

Grandma comforted her, saying, "What's wrong with being ugly? As long as you're hardworking and can earn a living, you'll be fine!"

The man was very satisfied and offered to give his parents a dowry of 100 yuan, doing everything he was supposed to do for the girl.

With the hundred yuan in hand, Dad immediately paid off two old debts and used the rest to prepare a dowry for his eldest sister. At eighteen, she got married.

During the first month of the lunar calendar, people visit their new son-in-law and relatives of all ages to exchange New Year's greetings. Whether rich or poor, the amount of meat prepared for the New Year must be sufficient to entertain guests.

On the second day of the Lunar New Year, after serving the new son-in-law seven or eight dishes, guests arrived one after another, with Dad and Grandma keeping them company. After the meal, the food was taken out, and Mom picked out the meat, saving the usable vegetables for later. Unexpected guests arrived—the four maternal uncles from Diaoyutai, the uncle from Mutaiying, and the great-aunt from Zhaozhuangtuo. Everyone who had shown kindness, loyalty, or even a past relationship throughout the year was invited, as was the old custom, with Dad and Grandma keeping them company. Dishes prepared for the next meal were saved for later.

The banquet features four large bowls and eight dishes, with plenty of water before the meal, tea after the meal, and wine during the meal. Meat dumplings are served to guests and their companions.

The soup was served with some vegetable scraps, and a large circle of sweet potato buns sat on a steamer rack. Mom and the children ate at another table. Sometimes, friendly guests would say, "Come on, kids, have some," but Dad and Grandma would reply, "They'll be eating later."

Although we are an ordinary family, we still have strict rules. Whatever Grandma and Dad say, whether it is right or wrong, we have to listen, not speak, and not argue.

After the sixteenth day of the first lunar month, my eldest sister came back for some business, had lunch, and then left.

The next morning, Mother got up early and made a bowl of porridge, bringing it to the kang (heated brick bed). Father was still in bed. Mootou's wife came in from outside: "I heard Fenglian is back. Has she left yet? I was thinking of having her take her cotton-padded coat back with her; we wore it a couple of days ago." She entered the room and blocked Father's way, who was still in bed. Referring to her as Father's younger brother, she joked, "Zhang Xiwang is really lazy. His wife has brought the porridge to the kang, and he still hasn't gotten out of bed."

The mother chimed in, "Fenglian went home after dinner yesterday."

Moo-headed wife: "I've come all this way for nothing." With that, she turned and walked away.

Mom: "I won't stay any longer." She sent him out.

When they arrived in the street, Moo-tou's wife told everyone she met that Zhang Xiwang was lazy; even when his wife brought him porridge and a bowl of porridge to the kang (a heated brick bed), he wouldn't get up.

Dad sat up, picked up his cotton-padded jacket, patted the sleeves against the ground, then patted it a few more times before putting it on, slipping on his trousers, and getting out of bed. Mom folded his quilt, and Second Sister carried it up to the end of the kang (heated brick bed), got off the kang, put down the table, got a bowl, and served some pickled vegetables.

After finishing her meal, she had to go to work.

Father strolled in slowly and washed his face in the washbasin Mother had prepared for him. He climbed onto the kang (heated brick bed), and the family began to eat. Just as Second Sister put down her bowl, a rapid series of clanging sounds rang out, and she hurried away. It was definitely the clanging from Team One. All four teams in the village used to ring their drums for work, each with its own rhythm; the villagers were used to it and could easily distinguish which team's drum was ringing.

After finishing his meal, the older brother picked up his schoolbag and went to school.

Grandma and Dad were at the same table, and Grandma complained again, "Our eldest daughter came back yesterday, but she didn't get enough meat!"

Father: "Her needs no introduction! She's all involved in favoritism and obstruction."

Mom: "If I were to secretly give some to someone, who would I give it to? My own daughter, why wouldn't I give it to her? I don't have any relatives."

Grandma got upset again and started yelling, "You don't have any relatives, but they're all my relatives! You think I have too many relatives? You think my relatives are coming to visit?"

Dad raised his fist at Mom, but ultimately didn't bring it down. Mom was over five months pregnant.

Grandma, still seething with anger, sought revenge on Mom in another way. She stayed in bed for days, refusing to get up, eat, or drink, threatening to starve to death.

The mother was so frightened that she kowtowed and apologized. She made a variety of delicious dishes and brought them to her grandmother's bedside. After coaxing her into a calmer mood, the grandmother stopped talking and got dressed, and that was it.

As the saying goes, good news doesn't travel far, but bad news travels fast.

The stories of how strange Grandma was, how eccentric Dad was, how the mother and son bullied Mom, and how they treated Mom badly spread throughout the five mountain villages.